On marriage and mysteries

It’s hard to imagine contentedness before it finds you.

Find a good spouse, you find a good life; and even more: the favor of God! — Proverbs 18:22 (The Message)

Perhaps I’m just reacting to post-wedded bliss. Perhaps this is early domestication that’s suiting me well. It’s hard to say, since I’m caught up in the moment. Think Schrödinger’s cat 1.

As most of you know, I got married in August… the day before my birthday. By far, this was the best birthday yet, and easily the best wedding I’ve been too! You all made it so wonderful.

Orthodox Marriage is seen as an act of God in which he joins two believers (a man and a woman) into one. 2

That Friday morning was cool and quiet. While the world bustled by outside those gorgeous church doors, Sarah and I exchanged vows of permanence and intentionality, of love and commitment. And all of you were there (either in the “real world” or virtually) to bear witness. The day was perfect.

Anglican wedding
Anglican wedding

In the Orthodox tradition, examples of “mysteries” are holy Communion, baptism, and even marriage.

An Orthodox definition of mystery might be any action in which a person connects to God. 3

Most of these ideas have bled into Protestantism. In the case of the “mystery of marriage”, I like how the phrase has an actual religious heritage. It’s not just something we say, but has meaning, a root.

…marriage is also treated as a sacrament, and as an ordination, and (like all ordinations) like a martyrdom, as each spouse learns to die to himself or herself for the sake of the other. 4

What I couldn’t have imagined was how sacred the mundane can be. Simply relaxing at our kitchen table and reading the paper can be a deeply profound thing. Of course eating Sarah’s wonderful food is anything but mundane! That she spoils me so, I’m sure, contributes to my state of bliss. Ahh, what do I know about marriage? It’s humbling to know how far I have to go, but it’s fun to learn more each day.

Just married!
Just married!


  1. The theory of quantum mechanics says that you can’t know if the cat in the box dies of poison unless you open the box, thereby disturbing the experiment. In practical terms, Schrödinger’s cat represents a loss of objectivity when making observations. Wikipedia article on the subject.
  2. from the article “Eastern Orthodox Church” on Wikipedia
  3. Ibid
  4. from the article “Christian views of marriage” on Wikipedia






9 responses to “On marriage and mysteries”

  1. James Avatar

    It was one of the biggest honors of my life to be best man at your wedding. It was an unbelievable experience. One I’ll treasure forever.

  2. Kim Avatar

    Glad to see you back online. By the way, beautiful frothing technique. You are (or Sarah is) almost there on making microfoam that will assist in the creation of latte art. And remember, latte art comes from the wrist (more info can be found at coffeegeek.net).

    You two are so cute! I’m glad I was there to witness your happiness.

  3. Lynda Avatar

    Hi Rob and Sarah,
    Loved reading this. You two sound so happy. God has truly blessed you. My prayer is that you will always continue to put God first, each other second. I giggle to myself about the struggle of your decision Rob to even move to Colorado! Wow!!

  4. Rob Avatar

    Hey Kim, who tipped you off to the froth? Oh, that’d be me I guess. That’s a separate post (with pics, I promise). You’re getting ahead of me!

    Jimmy, it was so great that you and the fam were there! Oh, we got a compliment on your sermon toast too. 😉

    Sar, you’re the best!

    btw, the photos above and in my photo album are from Brother-in-Law Jim. He was our pro photographer. You’ll see more of his great work here soon.

  5. Jules Avatar

    Ahhhh, what a nice post. I am glad to hear of your happiness!

    I love marriage. . . It’s difficult sometimes and I am finally starting to understand that no matter what James’ love for me isn’t going to change, even if I’m moody and difficult. I am also learning that God’s feelings for me are always loving and faithful, even when I am not. I have been married nearly 16 years and some things are just now starting to really sink into my soul and spirit.

    You have a wonderful life ahead of you full of promise and adventure!

  6. Rirath Avatar

    Congratulations to the both of you! And for the record, any post about a marriage that includes a footnote about the theory of quantum mechanics is +1 in my book.

  7. Mary Avatar

    Great post, Rob. You and Sarah are so great together. Being married to the love of your life is wonderful. Carl and I have been married 17 years; it is great to see you and Sarah starting out on the road.

    P.S. You are one of the most geekiest romantics (or is it romantic geek)! I love that you have this great romantic wonderful prose, and then you throw in the quantum mechanics section just to keep your tech side happy.

  8. Angela Avatar

    Great photos!
    You two definitely look happy!

  9. Ciera Avatar

    I am whoafully behind in saying this…but congrats to both of you on your wedding and marriage!!!! Many happy years!

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