Migratory Mark

My brother-in-law Mark lives in Littleton, but Sarah and I think he should live closer to us in Colorado Springs. In fact, we have many good, convincing reasons for his southern migration. Let’s look at them.

For Mark’s convenience, I’ve arranged these Very Good Reasons® in the form of a top 10 list. And as top 10 lists work, they are listed in descending order numerically, but in ascending order of importance:

Reason #10

Old Colorado City is home to the Prince of Blades sword shop. All your various cutlery needs could be met here!

Reason #9

Colorado Springs has one of the finest breweries this side of Bavaria. At the Bristol Brewery, the beer flows like wine.

Reason #8

Knowing that you would like to pursue higher education, we thought another possibility would be the Ninja University of Marital Arts. Here is an excerpt from their curriculum:

Lesson [sic] are taught in the various exotic weapons arsenal of the Ninja. All of which include, but not limited to the kusurigama, kyogestsushoge. marikikusuri, shinobi-to, shuriken and etc… Manipulation of one’s environment to overpower an adversary lye [sic, or perhaps the alkaline solution is precisely intended?] within the realm of the Ninja. As Ninja individuals are taught to use anything at their disposal as a weapon.

Just think how you could spread good will and cheer through our fair city as one of its many resident Ninja Masters!

Reason #7

But seriously, Pikes Peak Community College would make an excellent choice.

Reason #6

Reason #5

Colorado Springs is home to many fine apartment complexes, and any of these could be home to you! For instance:

• The Parc at Briargate – $645 – $685
• Sagebrook – $612 – $1100
• Grand River Canyon – $707 – $826

And bear in mind that any move to the above options earns you a volunteer mover from yours truly and your sister (who found all this great data online).

Reason #4

Colorado Springs has a great YMCA. Not only does the Y have all your favorite amenities like top-notch weightlifting and aerobic machines, it also has racquetball! No more scrambling at the end of the day to reserve a court in Denver, and cramming in a couple games every other week. If you lived here in the Springs, we could play all… the… time.

Reason #3

Colorado Springs is home to a fine independent movie theater — Kimball’s Twin Peak Theater. Guy movie night just got better in Colorado Springs with Kimball’s great benefits:

1. Non-matinee pricing is only $7.50. Contrast that to Highlands Ranch’s AMC 24 price of $9.75! Kimball’s offers you a 23% savings!
2. Matinee pricing is only $5.50
3. They serve beer (and other adult beverages), which you can take into the theater with you!

Nothing more needs to be said.

Reason #2

Our church, First Presbyterian Church of Colorado Springs, has a great 20-something singles class called Bridges. Good friends, fun events, single gals. Need I say more? Which brings us to the #1 reason to move to Colorado Springs (and thereby live closer to your beloved sister and brother-in-law)…

Reason #1

Mark’s future wife lives here! We’re not exactly sure where she is, but she is here. I’m sure you can find her on one of our many beautiful mountains or trails, hiking or biking.

Mark, I helped you sell your car. Now I’m helping you move to the Springs.

So all you blog readers, what do you think? Should Mark stay where he’s at in Littleton, over 60 miles away from us, his dear family? Or should Mark live in our fair city?

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